Everyday is a new day

So, the blogging hasn’t gone as well as I would like it to, but in my defense I have been in school for the past year and keeping up with that, work and life during this crazy time has kept me pretty busy.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m working on setting aside more time for myself to do the things I enjoy. (reading, napping and crochet are the top 3 things on my list!) I only have 3 months of school left though and I am determined to get through this and be a straight “A” student for the first time in my life. Not easy, but in the end it will be worth it. Thankfully I have a great bunch of gals in class with me, wonderful friends, my sweet pups and kitties and Logan.

I feel like too many people have spent too much time thinking about all the ways 2020 and 2021 have been awful and that makes me sad. I have a lot to be thankful for and if 2020 and 2021 hadn’t happened, I might not have made the decisions that have led me to this point in my life.

  1. I started school after thinking about it for way too many years
  2. I have started consciously thinking about doing more writing and reading and not just to shame all of my friends on Goodreads 😉
  3. I have realized that letting go is sometimes the best thing to do and my mental health is more important that letting others bully me into doing what they want me to do.
  4. I have also realized that it is not shameful to talk about my anxiety and depression. I talk about not for sympathy, but so that others know they can talk to me. Also so they can be aware that sometimes I struggle and it has nothing to do with anyone but myself.

While maybe not the most extensive list, it is one I cherish because #3 especially has always been hard for me. I still fail at this task sometimes, but at least I am getting better about it.

I would actually love to hear all the things you are thankful for that 2020 and 2021 have brought to your life. Have a great day! Soak up some sunshine and give a dog a kiss!

To see what else I am reading or to check out my book recommendations head on over to my profile on Goodreads. You can also check me out on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/lifewithmaddi or follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/divinesecretsofabibliophile/

And the adventures continue…

So after yesterday mornings Delbert surround sound, I was getting ready for bed and every night before bed I make sure either Logan or I take the dogs out. Last night Logan wasn’t feeling well and went up to bed early so I was on dog duty. As I was getting ready to take the dogs out I start hearing something falling or being shifted. At first I was worried Logan had fallen or something, but then I realized it was coming from the kitchen and that always means the cats are getting into something.

I get up and start heading that way, but no cat in sight. Then I saw that the drawer for the tupperware was all the way open.

DAMMIT REGINALD!

This cat. I love this cat. I also regularly want to strangle him because he loves getting in through this drawer because it sometimes slips open and I keep forgetting to buy child locks for it. So I wander over and am talking to him. The conversation went something like:

Me: Huh. Get yourself stuck silly boy?

Reggie: *glares at me with an obviously you moron look*

Me: That sucks. I know you can get out on your own though. Come on.

Reggie: *more glares followed by him working his way out while I hold the drawer still for him.

He gets out fairly easily and then proceeds to run away because he got caught being stuck and now he is embarrassed.

sorry for the blurry photo, he was angry….

Now I have a cat who is angry because he got caught and I’m going to have to find child locks. If you don’t hear from me in a week just know that I fought Reggie off until the very end….

I have finished reading 2 books and a short story this week and gotten my school work done and my house isn’t a total disaster. Does that make this a successful week? I think so.

I will have separate posts for the books because they are both wonderful and deserve their own post so I can tell you how much I enjoyed them. I think then, I will talk to you about the short story I just read for the first time in many, many years. “The Yellow Wallpaper”

Have you read this short story? If you haven’t or it has been a long time, you should. I found it here after finding the link to it in one of my emails although for the life of me I can’t remember which blog had it tagged for me. Whoever it was, thank you, I needed to read this again. Seems things always come along when they need to and this short story is no different.

I always liked this story because you can make many different arguments for what our main character is going through, but I think it is commonly know that she is suffering from post-partum depression. My heart breaks for her every time I read it because although the time frame is never said, it always seems to be so long ago and they just thought she needed rest and she wasn’t allowed to do things because her husband (he’s a doctor, of course) knows best.

Her struggle is real and while reading the story you can tell when things start to become worse for her and all you want to do is hug her and love her and tell her that is okay and that her husband and sister-in-law suck. They don’t, they obviously love her, but they don’t know how to help and in the end, that was what made her worse.

It’s a story worth pondering and reading even if you have never had post-partum depression. I think it always rings true to me because I have had boughts of depression and I can relate to her on that level.

I put this post out here to let you know that you are not alone, that you are allowed to feel your feelings, but also to remind you to talk to your doctor if you are not feeling okay or like yourself. Life is strange right now (isn’t it always though?) and hiding those feelings away will not help. Reach out to friends and family. Reach out to me. Message me if you need to. I’ll end this with this quote I read on @TheBloggess today:

“Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.” ― Neil Gaiman

You can beat your dragons, but you don’t have to do it by yourself. Be kind, be safe and most of all, be happy.

Good Omens

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This is a classic. If you haven’t read it, you should. Right now. And then go and watch the Amazon series they did with David Tenant and Michael Sheen. It is also fantastic.

Have you not read Good Omens? Really? Oh my. I’ll wait. Go.

I have not only read the book, but have listened to the audiobook and watched the Amazon series they did over it. I love the subtle references to God being a woman, the differences between the book and the series (a lot like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy that way).

Aziraphale and Crowley are two immortal beings (an angel and demon respectively) who have been living on Earth since the beginning of time. Over the centuries they developed an unlikely friendship that neither likes to admit to, but with the end of the world approaching they must join forces to keep the planet and humans they are so very attached to in one piece.

Adam and “The Them” are a group of kids who always play the best games and even get to meet a real live witch living in their sleepy village.

Anathema and Newton are also an unlikely pair as a witch and a witchfinder.

This colorful cast comes together to help save the world, makes us laugh and cry and maybe figure just a few things out about life on the way.

Check it out, buy it or listen to it. I promise you, it’s worth every minute!

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Late Night Musings

Life since school as been…weird. I haven’t found a job yet, but I am looking and maybe it’s because I no longer have school to keep me on my toes, but I feel lost and unfocused. I feel as though nothing I do is right and I’m unsure whether that is because I’m being ridiculous or I am actually just really messing everything up. Thankfully I have the next couple of days to relax, make some appointments and get some things done around the house. Not being around anyone but my animals and Logan for a couple days may just do me some real good. Or it may make it worse. I may be overthinking everything. As much as I was hoping being done with school would help me (and it has a little), I feel more like I’m just wandering uselessly around these days. I either need to find a job, start volunteering somewhere, call around again to get into a therapist or all of the above. Too many of my days consist of me laying in bed because I don’t have anything else that I need to do. Why get out of bed when you are just going to move to the couch? Something has to change though, that’s all I know.

Today was eventful though. I took all 3 dogs to the vet by myself. All 3. By. Myself. It could have been worse for sure. Trey and Delbert are a little overweight so diets begin tomorrow and they won’t be happy. Cali is still a drama queen in her old age and both her and Delbert are going to have to get dentals now that they are a little older. $600 later and I have happy and healthy dogs. Now to just figure out how to get the boys to stick to their diet….

For their full adventures check out: https://www.instagram.com/divinesecretsofabibliophile

For tonight, I think I just need to relax, curl up with my pups and try not to think about anything real for at least 24 hours. Let’s see how successful I can be with that. Sorry for the whiney ramblings. Thanks for reading. Wish me luck!

Death Overdue

This was a super fun read and one I had a hard time putting down once I picked it up. The main character Carrie is a young woman who moves back in with her aunt and uncle while she figures out the next steps in her life. She ends up being offered and taking a new job at the library in town where she had been working part time. At her first event, Detective Al Buckley unexpectedly falls over and dies just as he was going to tell everyone about new evidence in a 15 year old case!

With a little help from the library ghost Carrie decides she needs to solve Al’s murder to ease her guilt and possibly also figure out who killed Laura all those years ago!

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A Rare Find is now easy to find!

A Rare Find

My friend has now published her 2nd book! A Rare Find is currently available via Kindle and here soon you will be able to get a signed copy of the book if you want!

You should totally go to her Facebook and check out her page at: https://www.facebook.com/mkdeppner.author

Also, if you haven’t read her first book Photographs of October, you should check it out!

She’s local and lovely and I couldn’t be more proud of her for doing this with her life!

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Fairmont found my heart

Fairmont Finds Canine Cozy Mysteries: Books 1-3 (Fairmont Finds Pet Cozy Collection Book 1)

So, as everyone who has ever met me knows, I love my dogs more than I love pretty much every human ever. This includes Logan and don’t worry, I have told him.

This book series are delightful cozy mysteries that I found through an email from Bookbub (seriously, I get so many great books from there). I knew that at the very least I would find a book about an adorable pup who helps solve crimes entertaining, but now they have also made me want to go back and start rereading “The Cat Who” series by Lillian Jackson Braun.

Cozy mysteries are wonderful and great escapes from work and school these days and these three books are no exception. If you love dogs and cozy mysteries, pick up a copy of Fairmont Finds and sit back to be entertained by this lovely dog and his human.

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Furiously Love this book!

Okay, so Jenny Lawson aka the Bloggess, may be my spirit animal and i have never not enjoyed something she has written and Furiously Happy is no exception. Like Broken, Furiously Happy is a memoir where she tells you about her life and her awkward wonderfulness. I like to go against the norm so it seems I am reading her books in reverse order, but they so far have proven to be wonderfully delightful. I did listen to Furiously as an audiobook and again, loved hearing Jenny herself narrate her story.

I may or may not also have a tiny Rory that stays in my car and travels with me everywhere. He never ceases to make me happy with his smile and arms outreached for a hug.

What’s your favorite memoir? I won’t lie, I prefer the funny ones, but am interested to hear about other memoirs that captivated you or changed you in some way.

Happy reading!

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Do you podcast?

So while going through school and externship and working I have found less and less time for reading and spent much more time listening to books and podcasts. Spotify and Audible have been godsends for me in so many ways. I have so many different subjects I enjoy listening to and Spotify has this great library feature that saves new episodes so that I can listen to them without having to search through everything and Audible has all of these great original stories that I otherwise wouldn’t have heard of along with authors I have known and loved for years.

Here lately I have spent a lot of time listening to the Public Radio Alliance podcasts such as Faerie, Rabbits, The Last Movie and I just started Tanis. These podcasts are weird and lovely and I am borderline obsessed with them. They aren’t just podcasts about murderers or ghosts or any of the hundreds of other things that podcasts are about, but more like serials where you are drawn into the story and the characters are ones you become attached to.

One of the writers of the podcast, Terry Miles, is coming out with a book titled Rabbits that is a stand alone story and I have already preordered it from Audible so that when I receive it I can start listening to it.

Also, I just found out that Bailey Sarian is coming out with a new podcast called “Dark History” and I am so excited about that also! I love her Monday videos and can’t wait to listen to her tell the weird and dark history stories that we never got to learn about in school.

What are some podcasts you listen to? I’m always looking for new and interesting things to learn about and in this busy day and age, podcasts have become a pretty solid way to learn these things.

Don’t forget to follow me on Goodreads, Facebook, and Instagram . Happy reading and listening and remember to always be kind.

Warbound and Lost

Oh….My…..Lanta. I was so sad when this book ended. My love for this world grew with every book and I can’t wait to dive into the side stories about these characters. This action packed final book in the Grimnoir Chronicles did an excellent job of wrapping everything up and leave the reader wanting more. My heart continuously sank as I feared for the characters, laughed with them and cried with and for them.

Faye and Jake go on their own paths to be reunited at the end. Just when you didn’t think Faye could be any more magnificent, she goes and proves just what a rare and special gem she is. While her and Jake have always seemed odd and slow to some, no one can deny that they prove you should never judge a book by it’s cover. While I loved the way the series wrapped up, I was devastated to have to close that chapter on these characters.

Have you not read it yet? Seriously? Go! Now! Read!

To see what else I am reading or to check out my recommendations head on over to my profile on Goodreads. You can also check me out on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/lifewithmaddi or follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/divinesecretsofabibliophile/

Just a side note…

My mental health is a daily struggle and every time I think I have taken a step forward, it seems i take 2 steps back. I’ll do so well and then something will happen that while maybe not a big deal to other people, sends me into a spiral that normally ends up with me crying in all kinds of inappropriate places.

I recently lost my cousin to cancer just 2 days before her 41st birthday. She was one of my best friends and biggest supporters and it has been so hard without her. I didn’t get to call her to tell her I took my CPC test or that I passed with an 82. She would be so proud of me and even though I know that, the accomplishment seems less bright because she isn’t here to share it with me.

Hug your loved ones tight, answer those annoying phone calls and texts, and be sure to tell the people you love that you love them. Life take unexpected turns at the drop of a hat.